Tuesday, April 10, 2007

"Grease is the Word!"

After being in the Golf Vacation Business for 7 years, and the Vice President of Golf Zoo Inc., you probably expect me to be a tradionalist with a USGA bag tag and a copy of the Rules of Golf in my bag.

Not even close.

I'm a weekend hackin' chop who looks for every advantage (legal or not) I can get on my weekend buddies who often will make ridiculous "double down" bets on the tee at 18 to avoid buyin a beer or 7. I have a full time gig, and a three year old daughter who is heavy into activities... Who has the time or the patience to practice? Gimme a break.

I have found the answer.

I recently read Rick Reilly's "Who's Your Caddy" where he caddies for a number of different characters - one of them being the infamous Dewey Tomko, the most notorious golf gambler on the planet. Dewey explains that the gamblers frequently "grease up" their clubs with various lubricants to take the spin off the ball and get more distance, so I figured what the hell - if it's good enough for Dewey......

I proceed to Walgreens, pick up a tube of Vaseline intensive care and immediately start talkin' trash on the first tee at Eagle Mountain. I cover the entire clubface of my driver with a generous portion and stripe it 260 down the middle. There was no talkin' to me the rest of the day. I was greasin' up anything from the driver down to 8 irons. It was beautiful. I typically hit a pretty serious fade, and I promise you that a little vaso did the trick. Walked outa there with a nifty little 81 where I don't believe I've ever broken 85.

I don't think the boys at the PGA would agree, but it sure was fun free swingin' and not having to bother the snakes...

Thanks Dewey. You're my hero.


  1. Thanks for the tip,Chris.It really works.
    I played at Rancho Manana in Arizona this weekend and shaved 8 strokes off my average score.I didn`t use the "Grease" until I had an 11 over after 4 holes,my score could`ve been even better.I live in Texas and will be shocking friends and family with my new found way of playing golf.

    My ball and pockets will be seeing a lot more GREEN in my future.

    Jody (J-Man)

  2. Wow, this sounds like a new excuse for that missed shot. "Oops too much grease" as the ball slides sideways.

    Cheers from,
    J.J. Gowland
    Author of "Confessions of a Sandbagger"

  3. I read the article in Golf Digest about greasing the face of a driver. I tried it out with a limited amount of success. Being a thinkin man I started playing around with different kinds of lube. After rigorous R&D I settled on cleaning the face really well and applying a coat of car wax before putting on a thin coat of Mobil 1 motor oil,It works great. I went from hitting fairways about 30% of the time to hitting them about 80% of the time.